... i was not there ...

... i was not there, so now you all are really good friends, and i'm not in the ring ...
... i was not there, so now you all have made up a secret garden of yourselves, and i'm not allowed to be in there ...
... i was not there, so now you all share the keys to your hearts and secrets, and i'm not getting even a visitor pass to get through the security ...
... i was not there, so now you all live together inside a small wonderful utopia you all have created, and i'm not getting a tiny little glimpse of it, never to mention even a chance for me to take a 5 seconds tour in it ...
... i was not there, so now you all are closely connected to each other, and i'm just one of those you say hello-how are you-doing fine?-oh so nice-i'm doing all fine here-hope to see you again-we must meet up!-i'll miss you much-goodbye and then never put me on your mind type of friend, and a funny me still hoping that we can actually become better, how funny am i ...
... i was not there, so now you all will live on together till years years later, and what about me? i'll be just a friend acting as a by-stander in your journeys of life ...
... just because i was not there, i don't get the key to your lives and stories ...
... just because i was not there, i'm blocked by a wall and will never get to see the inside of your hearts, to know how you actually feel ...
... just because i was not there, i'm pushed away from you all, like an outsider trying to intrude the very own world of you all ...
... just because i was not there, JUST BECAUSE I WAS NOT THERE ...
... why was i not there ... ... ...
... why was i not there ... ... ...
... i opened my heart but not getting what i needed, just because i was not there ...
... i did whatever i can but not getting the pass into the world, just because i was not there ...
... i spent my time with you all and shared my stories of life with you all but what you all did was turning away from me after listening to it, not giving me a small little share of your cakes of life, just because i was not there ...
... just because i was not there, just because I WAS NOT THERE IN THAT PLACE DURING THAT TIME WITH YOU ALL AND I'M GETTING ALL THESE! ...
... fine then ...
... since i was not there, then i won't be there ...
... what would it turn out to be? you all won't be getting a slight glimpse of it either ...
... what would my life be? wait, but you all won't be listening to any stories from me ...
... what would my future life be? i'll live on, leaving you all behind and move on in my own way ...
... since i was not there, then i won't be there ...
... since i was not there, so i won't be there ...